1. I don't like watching/listening to other people in their honeymoon phase. It's annoying. Especially when they're trying out new pet names. It makes me want to wear ear plugs and a blindfold.
2. I don't like chocolate. Plus it makes you break out. And it will make you gain weight if you eat a lot of it. Why are you trying to make your loved ones fat and zitty?
3. If you have a valentine shouldn't you show them you love them everyday?
4. Fixed menus. Have you (the single person without a date) every tried to go out to eat dinner on Valentine's Day? You either can't go in because you don't have a reservation or you have to select from some ridiculously expensive, everything is red with food coloring, not appetizing short list. Turns out mexican restaurants are the way to go on Valentine's Day. The tequila helps too.
5. The only valentines I get are from my mom (sparkly glitter stickers) and my 90 year old grandfather.
6. The sound of other people kissing makes my ears bleed.
7. Redheads can't wear red. Therefore I wear black. So should you.
8. Mass produced roses always lose their smell. And die really quickly.
9. February is a stupid month. That's why it's so short: everyone hates it. They only stuck Valentine's Day in there to try and make it pass faster. It only makes me hate it more.
10. Pink is the greatest color to ever be invented and I don't like that it's associated with the debacle that is Valentine's Day.
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