My neck got a little redder this weekend

This weekend I participated in one of the oldest and most respected redneck passtimes: NASCAR.  I have to say, I was skeptical.  I mean, when we got there I refused to even roll down my window to talk to anyone to figure out where to park.  Aaron kept saying, "Ask that guy, should we ask her?" My response: "No! Don't open your window! We'll figure it out, don't talk to anyone."  However, I finally gave in when I saw a line of cars lined up to a lovely lady with 2 missing teeth, drinking a beer, directing big giant pick up trucks into parking spots.  When I finally got up the courage to roll down the window and talk to her, the few remaining teeth (which were a little blacker than a healthy smile usually is) informed me I could park anywhere on the grass......FOR FREE!  What?  Free tickets and free parking?  Ok, 1 point for Texas Motor Speedway.

So, we parked.....well, after waiting for the dummies next door to close their car door and the crazy feathered hair, over hairsprayed crazy woman walked in front of me not once, but three times!  All I'm saying is, if you're going to start drinking at 8am, learn to walk......football tailgaters have been doing it for years, I believe you can do it to.  Anyway, so we park.  While we walked through the throng of giant pick up trucks and DuPont jacket clad smokers, we approached the "free stuff" area.  Most intriguing had to be the blacked out Skoal compound.  Obviously you had to be "21 years of age and a current tobacco user" to enter (so obviously I didn't go in) but I have to say I wanted to know what those bouncers were hiding behind those black walls!  We kept walking, and went inside....to be greeted by a margarita stand.  That was fun, so we bought one (it was pretty disgusting, but whatever).  I guess we didn't get the memo that we should have brought our own cooler filled with bud light and peanuts, but apparently not only can you park for free, you can bring alcohol INTO the....stadium? arena? stands? whatever the sitting part is called.  And, the people are super nice and even offer you cookies and Mike's Hard Lemonade from their personal supply!  Football fans don't do that.

So, we find out seats (next to a man with a VERY expensive digital camera a super telescope lens and in front of some crazy woman with an accent so think I was pretty sure she's been flown in from rural Kentucky by one of the many helicopters that were bringing fans from who knows where).  And then.....we realized that Willie Nelson was singing!  I don't know where he was.....clearly nowhere near us, but it's still a pretty big deal.  I mean the man is 137 and a Texas legend, right?  So that was exciting.  But then, the ridiculousness started: they introduced every single driver and then put them in a Chevy truck and drove them around the entire racetrack!  That took forever, and then they finally got all the cars started up and the ground started rumbling (I'm in love with that by the way) and then they did a million pace laps.  I don't really get that part or how all the crazies knew when the pace car was going to pull off......but all of a sudden everyone started standing up and then.....it started.

I don't really know exactly what happens or why things happen when they do.....and I find it annoying that they have to slow down and follow the pace car every once and a while.  Like at some point some guy blew his motor or something so everyone had to slow down to they could make sure there was no oil on the track.  And then two other cars got kicked out too....although I couldn't tell you why.  Then some guy spun himself out on the grass and they had to make everyone stop so they could sweep the grass away.  And then some guy shredded his tire and they had to clean that.  Somehow, people seem to know when the pace car is going to pull off and everyone starts standing up and yelling, which is all very exciting.  I haven't figured that part out yet.  Nor have I figured out why some guys get to catch up when the pace car comes out or what a free lap is.....but they fans hate that.  I also don't understand if the time stops when they are on clean up duty or if those laps count or what.

I really want to go back and get the little headphones that all the "serious" fans wear so you can listen to the drivers talk to their pit bosses.....I think that probably changes a lot, but it's still SUPER fun!  Perhaps the funniest part was the text I got from Fred after I told him I was having fun stating:
Just remember if you wind up liking this sport you could find yourself singing C & W music, wearing hot pants, and out looking buy a trailer!  I'll love you no matter what....even if your neck gets a little red.